National Wine & Cheese Fair: The Return

Among the benefits of being in Mexico, living with people with
connections is that you get access to those connections. It seems
every few days we are allowed an opportunity that would normally be
off limits to a couple of visiting whities. Before returning o the
feria, we made a pitstop at Jerry The Undertakers's house. His
daughters just received their first communion. As with any other
special event in Mexico, there is an expensive party. No doubt
thousands of dollars were spent on having a 2 course meal plus dessert
catered for the more than 50 guests. Not to mention the DJ and his
wall of speakers and an open bar (from which I enjoyed a virgin piña
colada as well as a virgin mojito). Words can scarcley describe the
auburn haired, plucked eyebrow entertainer that had been hired for the
few hours of the dinner. He sang, told jokes and did costume-enhanced
impressions. All in typical cheesy Mexican TV style.

A other highlight of that afternoon was meeting a white couple in
their mid-80s from Houston. They didn't speak or understand a lick of
Spanish, but of the course of a dozen 2 week trips to Tequisquiapan,
they had become adopted family to two generations of a Mexican family
at the party. The had been married 65 years and had been all over the
world. They were clearly having a great time. Pretty awesome.

Saturday I learned a great secret of the public education system in
Utah. Apparently there is a foreignc exchange program organized with
the Driver Education Programs in Utah and Mexico. After we were
dropped off at the fair on Saturday night, the connection became
obvious. Many aspiring drivers spend time in Mexico learning to drive.

The comic surrealism of our drive overrode any concerns of self-
preservation that I should of had. I couldn't help but chuckle as we
rapidly wove around traffic on one lane, blind corner city roads, and
even parked halfway on the sidewalk as we waited for Yoatzin to pull
some strings.

Not only is she offering her bungalow to us while she is here, her
position as an assistant to the Presidente of the municipio offers her
(and us) considerable sway with folks. For example rather than have
to park a half mile away like the regular folk we, after a phone call
to the sherriff/chief, were able to park 15ft away in the dedicated
police only parking lot.

As we followed our Mexican chorts we were led to the front row where
we had sat the night before, but because we arrived late there wasn't
a seat to be had. I guess our fame has continued to grow because the
police then produced a whole new row of chairs. We could hear the
people behind us (the former front row) grumble how they had arrived
two and a half hours earlier to get their seats. Who were we to get
our own front row ab the last minute, even in front of the line of
police? We were personal guests of the Presidente of the Municipio
and we arrived with the queens of the fair, that's who. As the lights
on stage dimmed shouts of excitment and anticipation spread, I began
to realize the special treatment we were receiving. We enjoyed a rock
concert from the famous mexican band, Reik (pronounced rake). How
awesome to have red carpet treatment to a Mexican rock concert. We
didn't even have to pay a cover charge.
Lizzy, this wasn't planned, but apparently several bottles of
wine gave a rather girthy local the courage to try and get a little
gringo sugar. Believe me, you would see the Pope wearing a mullet
working at DollarTree before I would request the amourous advances of
that of woman. Alternating between English and Spanish she would tell
me she loved me and tell me don't worry nothing would happen to me(as
creepy as it gets) and cussing me out. I tried to ignore her the best
as I could while she kept dancing into me and attacking me with her
tentacles. My disgust is apparent in a photo I will post while I
can. I'm sure if the nearby cops had been able to keep from laughing
that they would have rushed to my aid. Unfortunately I was on my own
to parry her drunken onslaught.